Welcome to the Jungle

No, this isn’t a tribute to G ‘n’ R (although I can’t promise that won’t happen at some point).  Today we did a pseudo-safari (pseudo in that our vehicle was caged in) at The Lion Park.

Just like being at MGM Studios

I was convinced I was going to die, no thanks to the experience I had with my family at Bear Country last fall where they kept opening the car windows (with wild animals running free) as I yelled for them to shut them.  This was coming right off a rash of people dying after opening windows and getting of their cars in tiger parks, etc.  To quote my brother, I wasn’t so concerned with dying but rather with the fact that people would forever think I was one of those people who dies in a really, really stupid manner.  Isn’t that a terrible legacy?

Anyway, I didn’t die!  (Either time.)  And I’m so glad we went, because it was amazing!  (Also, I didn’t need to worry so much about being attacked since lions are lazy AAMF.). We didn’t see the Big 5 but saw a lot of other ones and heard a shit-ton of lions roaring in the background, echoing off the mountains.

The best part, however, is that we saw two lions “fall in love.”

The before picture

In the off-chance anyone out there is near a child around while reading this, we saw them share a special hug.  Which ends in a situation like this:

According to our guide, this giraffe is due to give birth “any day now”

(Side note:  I clearly filmed the lion action.  Click on the Contact button if you want to see it.)

Final thing about lions:  wegot to see feeding time.  One lion kept swinging its food around, which was obviously the leg of some animal.  I mean she was really whipping it around.  Unfortunately I didn’t get a shot because I couldn’t stop staring, but here’s a less interesting lion meal:

*Likes her steak rare*

And for some much-needed nongross funsies , here’s a pretty picture of zebras.

Those are wildebeests in the background.  Apparently the two species are tighter than Cher and Dionne because zebras have great daylight eyesight, and wildebeests have great night vision.  Learnin’ is fun!

After the animals it was time to head to the airport for Capetown!


How beautiful is that sunset?  Starting our initial descent, I was so excited to see it from the ground.

Then we went through 20 minutes of angry storm clouds where I couldn’t even see the ground until we landed. Terrerrible landing aside, Capetown has been suffering from a drought, so at least I could bring some rain with me (I can really ruin anything).

Still a beautiful view of the Waterfront though

It stopped raining long enough for me to go eat more fun meats for dinner.


This was a reeeeally difficult choice.  I ended up going with crocodile though (tastes like chicken with the consistency of fish…meta).  Don’t feel badly – crocodiles are dicks.  They (along with hungry, hungry hippos) are the two most dangerous animals in Africa.  They are also delicious!

Time for bed!

Night y’all!

3 thoughts on “Welcome to the Jungle”

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